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let me do the right thing;

let me do the wrong thing.

9/17/12 09:20 am - what we do is secret


3/28/12 03:48 pm

i'm really fuckin up

but i got new glasses and my catcard has been found so i feel a bit better

3/16/12 10:03 am

i haven't attended a class since february...

2/8/12 02:36 pm


aside from the fact that ripped my new nylons it's going to be a great day!

i'm going to go to the gym after class and then watch the syracuse bball game and then win pub quiz because i rock at everything.

1/23/12 11:47 pm


1/17/12 09:56 am

here we go semester 6!

1/9/12 03:24 pm - interwebz in sbux

Let me preface this with that I’m watching Donnie Darko with my mother and that regina spektor makes me cry like a baby.  It is now three days later and I’m reading a book that my 10th grade teacher gave me.  Back when alex zangari and I would eat pistachios in the back of the room and I directed a fucking play. And now it’s a day later and I have finished the book. Now, it’s not like I’ve been sitting around reading it, but I kinda have because I rode a bus to and from boston yesterday which took up about a good 7 hours of my life.  It’s just so stupid that this book is about a teenager in boarding school but I find it so touching that I cry throughout multiple parts of it.

I am now in the condo alone and I made lentil soup because I’ve decided it’s really childish to think I can eat anything when my parents aren’t around. But man, working at a grocery store and seeing all the yummy things people buy is just so cool.

I guess I haven’t been on lj in a while and it’s because I have no internet here and that always makes me sad (which is an even sadder point) because I spend too much time inside of my own head.  I can’t even waste time watching shitty television because there is no cable even. Whatever, such petty things to be upset about.

Anyway, since I finished school on the 7th of December I took two finals and ended up with my best GPA yet and I’m really hoping to make deans list. Then I pretty much took concerta to see how long I could stay awake for but in turn got pretty sick from not eating enough and drinking too much. I was annoyingly crazy.

Finally, I left Burlington and headed to Syracuse for a few dentist and doctors appointments and to be with Nicole! Saw Sam Kurey for the first time in like 6 months and overall it was a good time.  Left early on Wednesday (the 22nd) for Jersey City to see Nicole/Eric and my dad! Blah blah I was sick and got hiccups 14 times over the span of two days. Saw the lion king on broadway and my sister almost suckerpunched a very angry woman in Bloomingdales.

On a semi related note, many of my friends that have met my sister over the past few weeks have a very hard time believing that she is only 22. When I stand next to her I look like a 15 year old that got left in the city by themselves and then there’s Nicole being mad business-like and seriously conquering the city. Whoop de doop, I just hope I’m not disappointing my parents.

While stating in jersey city my friend Dale came and picked me up and brought me back to his house on the shore where we did stupid things like go to the jersey shore house and drink scotch at bars. We proceeded to call his boyfriend like 10 times that night until the people next to us at the bar asked us to stop calling people on speaker phone, hmm..

Anyway, I cried on Christmas partially because I was sick and partially because I was mad that my family went to church without me (not that I actually wanted to go but I still find that point irrelevant.)  My sister wouldn’t let me make the cranberry sauce because she thought my allergies would contaminate no matter how many times I pulled the noncommunicable card.  All of the anger settled when we sat down and swapped presents and I definitely got my sister the best presents that I’ve ever gotten her before so I felt pretty cool. I gave her two 6 packs of woodchuck cider and some really awesome gloves but she one upped me by giving me silver sperrys and a Marc Jacobs wallet (wtf) moveover, my parents got me a yoga mat and a new camera. I am now a proud owner of a Nikon D5100 and it’s pretty fuckin cool.

After Christmas everything moved pretty quickly. My parents left two days later and on the 29th I met Lara at the French consulate where they are biatchez. Anyway, we explored Rockefeller center for a bit and I stole a 30 rock magnet. Realizing we needed to get to the train station quickly we ran many blocks/avenues and ultimately found ourselves at grand central clenching onto tickets and a fuckin ton of dollar coins that the machine dispensed back to me. And then we were off to Beka’s in Westport where BMWs flood the streets and they have their own tiffany’s jeweler on the main street in town. Went to a diner that cost a good 4 times as much as the one and Baldwinsville and then played banagrams with a lot of girls.  The next day Lara Beka and I stopped at a restaurant that I drunkenly saw on a food network show and finally made it to Glastonbury where we left Beka for a long time for she is now already in paris. Lara and I proceeded to get our shit together and drive up to Burlington to meet my parents. And by this time it’s New Years Eve and were going to das pearl to get smooshy.

Now my mom is gone and lara is gone and ariel is leaving tomorrow and I’m listening to dido which also makes me sad.  I’ve come to the realization that I’m not very emotional in real life but when it comes to books, movies, and music I’m a sucker for anything. And because i'm not in school i have time to focus on better (different) things.  such as, reading, traveling, nail painting, relaxing, coffee-ing without a purpose. meh meh meow

I move back into my dorm on Tuesday and I just finsished a camera that needs to be developed so I guess…photos to come.

Hope everyone has had a wonderful holiday (if you made it this far into the entry…)

12/20/11 02:54 am - effffff 'em all

damnit b+

11/30/11 04:38 pm - sam, i just wanna come play mario party

i'm stressing, hard.  i just took my first final of the semester and i realized i couldn't even remember what a data series was, efffffff. i had my RA evaluation today and i'm seriously considering a senior RA position. i'm really confused as to who i am right now. i don't know if i'm missing out on the "off campus" experience but i don't feel like i'm missing out on anything. i was nominated to do this "women in politics" five day thing over the summer in new hampshire so i think i'm going to do that to please my dad because supposedly there is a lot of networking opportunities there and that maybe then he can stop bitching about my lack of a future.  also, pretty sure i landed an internship in las vegas for the summer so it'll be nice to stay at the new house and have a room again.

edit: back from yoga with a sandwich and the lady forgot to put the cheddah on my turkey, WHAT.

i don't care that i did shitty on my coffee paper because in reality this is the class that i actually care about:

bville: i'm coming home on the 17-22nd, hang out with me plz.

11/16/11 07:00 pm

one more day until 10 days of break, thanks uvm.

11/3/11 10:03 am

school is so hard

10/26/11 12:45 am

this past weekend i went to see portugal. the man and it was the most amazing thing ever. we left for boston around 730 and got to will's house around 1030 in topsfield which is about 30 minutes out of boston so shortly after settling in we made our way to the city.  first we met up with gillian's parents and then decided to explore. the majority of us hadn't been to boston in years so it was nice.  decided to meet up with owen at harvard so we found rc's finals club or whatever the fuck they're called there. let me tell you, this kid was douche status, like, seriously, just because you go to harvard doesn't mean ya need to be a dick. anyway, left there and hit up boloco for some smoothies to mix our kratom in. i was semi-nervous at first but it was actually really awesome. pretty similar to vicodin and i was just rocking (literally) throughout the whole set.

alright, so we didn't get a shot with john gourley himself but ya know, the bassist is pretty damn close.
just watch the video and damn, it's just so good.


10/6/11 11:57 am

livin in this sweet ass house next year, fuck ya

sorry about the condo, mom & dad

9/27/11 12:29 am - i'm not here to complain this time!

today i went to my 1040 and then i went downtown to bridget's on my bike. my brakes are COMPLETELY shot and i am now a hazard to all of my surroundings and myself. this is how my shoes look after using them to stop and shit. well, they looked pretty shitty before but my birks are just essentially rocked now:

anyway, today i went swimming! the water was probably 70 some degrees and 80 outside so it was awesome.  julia and i then met up with em and went on a 25 mile ride because it was just so nice out.  we're going to bike to montreal next week. it's only about 70 miles so nbd!

dnce urslf cln btchz

9/20/11 11:52 pm - CrUsHiN' (ice)

i've changed the name of this playlist 5 times over the past year or so.  i just change a couple of songs but essentially stays the same.  at first it was "lets face it i'm not stoned," then "let's face it i AM stoned," then "Welcome back!" then "..and it happened again" and now it is called "call the duty phone, i don't sleep anyway"

i'm having a hard time this year.
but, i got the lionel the lion award this week:

9/14/11 11:58 pm

productivity.... commence! 

I've been really down on myself for the past few weeks and old photos just make me sad.  claire asked how i listened to such "depressing" music but city & colour and death cab and brand new don't make me sad, i think of it as more reflective? anyway, today i went to my 1040 and then went to yoga flow which just seemed to point my day in the correct direction.  After that i snagged a good lunch, sat on the steps of the library, smoked a bowl and then went to butts and guts. I also gave blood and managed to win pub quiz with gil, dale and will.  now i'm here in my bed and my stomach is filled with a blueberry milkshake.  I don't know why I feel so unhappy because in reality everything is going perfectly except for the fact that we have a staff meeting on halloween.  My parents are coming in a few weeks and that'll be nice.  I've also been trained on the cash register at shaws so now instead of just packin produce i can count $$$ and banter with tyler while he bags groceries.  claire, gil, will lara and i will be making our way to boston on october 22nd to see...... PORTUGAL. THE MAN, yes, i said it.  I am just so excited. 

The thing that is the roughest right now is the fact that my bike is actually shit and I have to buy another one.

"only $ 499.00".......only?

8/31/11 01:13 am

this year i'm going to kick it into high gear for real. bought the group fitness pass, i rejoined pep band, the cynic and the swim club and i'm looking to join the hula hooping club (lolol) oh yeah and i'm an RA. i have around 30 residents on my floor and they all seem pretty cool. i hope they respect me because i do have a job i need to do and i will not put my job in jeopardy just so they can CARELESSLY fuck around. i've deemed myself the best RA already because i made awesome door decs and because my first community meeting had around 97% attendance! oh and because i did this: yes, for the next 9 months my posts will be about my struggles and triumphs of being a resident advisor at the university of vermont, bytchez

8/18/11 11:59 pm

and, i live in a dorm, again.

8/4/11 11:33 pm

^8 oN LyF3

ive become a couponer, like really hardcore and i'm seriously obsessed with listening to portugal. the man; i haven't felt this way about a band since either bright eyes or death cab.  i watch a lot of million dollar matchmaker and big rich texas which just makes me look like a dumb bitch but theyre really addicting shows. i had my blood drawn today for the second time this week because the health center thinks i have a fucked up thyroid but we'll see.  for dinner tonight i took egg roll wrappers and filled them with ricotta, chic peas, red onions, tomato and garlic and then baked them and paired them with hot sauce. my mom comes back on monday and then i start RA training in one week, WACKY.

the real update is that im still biking constantly.

7/19/11 02:18 pm - this is the best summer i have ever had

Deeper in and deeper still use your hands like eyes
Sift around the bottom row and soon will be your time
Keep your hands by your side

the tent i brought to bisco was missing some parts so we actually roughed it harder than we had planned to

but we made our way back to vermont and the new portugal. the man album was released today!

5/29/11 11:59 am - funny when youre dead how people start listenin'

how did i manage to allow myself to do the same thing twice?
fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me, right?

on a lighter note..

back in the condo!

5/25/11 12:12 am - hit me again


5/20/11 12:51 am

i feel like crying a lot lately and it sucks

5/2/11 12:20 pm

i'm in the library and if i'm not going to vom i'm going to punch someone.
tweakin on ritalin and this project is off to a good start.

4/13/11 02:49 pm

today, my wonderful teacher passed away.
she taught me things about myself and i am forever grateful.
i am very lucky to have had her for two semesters.

she did cool shit like this in her spare time:
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